How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
