Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
you had me at cake vodka
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Couch. On fire.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize