The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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