Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
