Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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