He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
