oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
it's great music for shaving your balls
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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