u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
We don't watch enough power rangers
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
