i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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