I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
We don't watch enough power rangers
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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