Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize