So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
