i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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