your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize