i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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