If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
