I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My life is pants optional.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
