And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Randomize
