Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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