I am puke
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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