i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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