we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
