I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize