you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
...so i touched it.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
