the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
