Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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