We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
