White coat. Heels.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize