you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
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