just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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