Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
