can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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