You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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