Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
