the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
