yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize