eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
