reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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