Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Apparently you make a good broom.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
