Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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