that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Randomize
