You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
