I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
