I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
