so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
