Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Randomize
