I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
