Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize