if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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