How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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